The Nine of Wands
Symbolism
Here stands a man resting himself on his wand, which he clutches with two hands. He stands alone and has a bandage around his forehead, suggesting he has been wounded and hurt in the past.
He looks cautiously behind him at eight other wands standing in the ground, knowing their power and fiery creativity. Remembering how he has been hurt in the past, he does not completely trust the wands behind him.
Keywords
Upright: Wounded healer, inner work, hesitance, hurt, pain, distrust, transformation through shadow, creating boundaries, abuse, wounds.
Reversed: Repressed trauma and pain, fear of creative power, distrusting self, lost faith, denying shame, sexual abuse trauma, disconnection from intuition.
Upright meaning
This character feels a hesitancy as he looks behind him, knowing that he has been wounded in the past. There has been pain, sadness and to some degree trauma. This is common to all of us. We have revisited our pain before, with life throwing up lessons in our faces. Now we are asked to face it by choice, and to walk through our shadow once again, on our healing journey.
We may feel triggered by people around us. There may be distrust and doubt. Although it is easy to throw blame onto the world, our maturity allows us to take responsibility for the wounds that we have come to heal. We can only transform the separation and fear, seen in this card, by owning it first. Then, we can inspire others to change in the same way.
There is a boundary message in this card also, with the figure obviously very guarded and defensive. If we have lacked boundaries in the past, it is time to revisit and learn those lessons. We must be able to say no or yes when it is true for us to do so. Although we need to own our part of any past conflict, we do not need to be wholly responsible for someone else’s experience.
If we are distrusting the world around us, this Nine asks us to recognize the mirror that life is. Fear and anxiety will usually make us defensive, and we will shut down. We can only trust ourselves more if we understand the painful mistakes of our past, and feel committed to a different reaction. We have the strength to stand in our truth and let go of what we no longer need.
Reversed meaning
The Shadow of this nine often refers to a suppression of a painful memory and a ‘blanking out’ of some traumatic lesson. This rejection of pain is a natural response when we don’t have the tools to deal with it. But if this card comes reversed, then maybe now we do. Let us dive a little deeper into our hurt so that we can walk more consciously into a chosen future.
When there is a hurtful memory, it is often accompanied by shame or blame. If we blame the world and play the victim card, we are asked to own our part in the story. If we blame ourselves and the memory is loaded with guilt and shame, it becomes even harder to own our mistakes or unconscious actions. Here, it is more important to shift our judgements about something before trying to take any responsibility.
With this reversal, we may feel exhausted, from stress, from dealing with others, or from some inner conflict that we are creating. We may contemplate giving up our purpose or our mission, or whatever changes we are trying to create. This card calls for a little more perseverance, because the ninth hurdle is not the place to give in, but instead get our heads down one more time.
Our wand can connect us to our hearts, and our hearts will always guide us with certainty and intuition. Right now, we may be distrusting our path. We may be feeling the same doubts as our ancestors as we recall our mistakes. The past may be holding us back. We are asked to recognize our gifts and those of others, and find the courage to step once again into our power.